I loved my old job. I was proud of what I did. It was interesting and crazy and stressful and I was passionate about it. But the insurance didn't pay for anything fertility related. And the pay was dismal. With student loans added in, it wasn't sustainable if we were going to jump into the fertility treatment realm.
I miss my old job. Miss the the people there. Miss the fulfillment it gave me.
And my new job? It pays well. Other than that, it sucks. I have to travel, leaving my husband. It's boring and unrewarding and going into the office every morning is harder and harder. I keep telling myself it will be worth it. And it will.
IF.
Yep, that's a big if.
If I get pregnant. If we get our family.
If not...
I can't even think about it. To give up what I love, to put myself through everything...
What if it doesn't work? What if it never works?
We've been saving money like crazy. As much as we can. For the possible IVF. What if it's all for nothing?
No comments:
Post a Comment