Sunday, July 21, 2013

Going Public

I'm pretty open about our IF.  My husband even more so.  And without asking me, although I'm ok with it anyways.  It's led to some good things such as his work being INCREDIBLY supportive of our IVF overseas plan to the point where his manager told him even if he had to take unpaid leave she would work it out.  And a co-worker scheduled to go on vacation around the time we have to go to Europe is willing to rearrange her time off to accommodate us.  I mean, wow.

So now he has decided - we - should write a blog detailing our trip to the Czech Republic as a guide/informative blog for those considering it as well as for a way for his family to follow our journey.  This is great, but I do already have my own blog.  So I will be linking to the posts on our shared blog once it's up and running as well as posting some stuff here too - the stuff I really don't want my family or his to know about.  The things that are the reason this blog remains anonymous at this point.  It may change in the future but really it's been my venting place - my way of just putting it out there.

Anyways, lately I've been tired.  Really tired.  I am taking a ton of supplements and eating more healthily so you would think I'd feel better (I've lost 5 pounds too!) but instead I feel lethargic.  I am trying to work out more (way more) but sometimes I really just want to sit on my couch and watch the marathon of Buffy the Vampire Slayer (which is incidentally on right now).  I know I'm now unemployed and my husband has be great telling me my job is just to be healthy and relaxed and I really want to give it my all so that IVF has the best chance of working but some days I just can't do it.

Today is one of those days.  I just can't bring myself to go get on the treadmill.  I need more motivation - you would think I would have all I need but today I just can't seem to do it.

Sometimes it just seems so unfair.  There are people out there who eat whatever crappy food they want, don't work out, get drunk and get pregnant.  And so many terrible parents out there.  Yet I have great test results, eat healthy, do everything I can to get pregnant and nothing.  Ugh.

Friday, July 19, 2013

Needles! (Acupuncture)

It's funny - I've had lots of needles poke me throughout this journey.  Hormone tests, HCG tests, pre-op tests, fertility drugs, etc.  But I've always shied away from doing acupuncture, despite hearing from so many sources it's good for fertility.

Now, I wish I'd tried it earlier.  It looks creepy - that's really the problem. But I had my first session yesterday and it was great.  I found this clinic that specializes in fertility acupuncture - the acupunturist took my history and boy was she thorough.  Then she stuck some needles in my back, put on a fertility meditation, put a heating lamp over my back, and left me to lie there for about 30 minutes.  It was so relaxing!  And you can barely feel the needles going in at all!

Afterwards I felt spacey and relaxed.  I'm going back once a week until we do the IVF.  It's kind of pricey but chalking it up to the costs of infertility :).  Never thought I'd recommend acupuncture but it actually seems to work!

Friday, July 12, 2013

Back on Track

Yes I said I would blog more.  No I did not.  But in my defense my family came to visit and we went out of town for 4th of July weekend and I'm just full of excuses today!

So we are back on the traveling for IVF plan.  When we sat down and talked about it and upon further research and communication with the clinic we are comfortable with doing it.  My husband's work has been really supportive and his boss (who apparently went through infertility herself) is bending over backwards to make sure he can take time off to go do the IVF.

When my next cycle starts (in about 2 weeks) I will be on birth control pills and then start the real deal and travel in early September.

In happy news, my hormone panel came back great.  I was worried I would have high FSH.  FSH is follicle stimulating hormone.  As women age, the body has to produce more and more FSH to get the ovaries to pump out an egg.  So when your FSH gets high, it means you have less eggs left and your body is having trouble getting ovulation going.  Luckily, my number was very good - 6.6.  My understanding is less than 15 is in the clear! All the other hormones were good too so we are very hopeful this will work for us!

And also in happy news, my family member who has been living with us for the last 2 1/2 months (and driving my husband crazy and creating stress in the house) is moving out tomorrow!  He got a new job, a new girlfriend, and a new apartment all in a couple of weeks.  Of course, don't get me started on the new girlfriend he started dating literally days after his divorce was final and immediately jumped into a committed relationship with.  That is a whole nother story.  Suffice it to say, on their first date he told her he was an unemployed recently divorced recovering drug addict and apparently that's a-ok with her.  Who knows?  I'm just happy to have my house back (and my remote control).

I'm now selling a bunch of stuff I accumulated over the years on ebay in an attempt to subsidize the IVF travel.  One of the interesting problems I ran into is whether to put the reason for my fundraising in the listing.  Is it too "trying-to-get-sympathy"?  Will it turn some people off for fear we are doing something unethical?  I really don't know.  For the record we've already decided not to have any of our embryos destroyed.  If we are blessed enough to have extras we will go back for sibling(s) and if we somehow ended up still having more we would have them adopted.  All embryos created in our IVF will be given a chance at life.

Well that's it for now.  More on the clinic we picked and why later!